Why Am I In An Engineering School?

That's the question I always ask myself during the first few weeks of my freshman year in an Engineering school, and I still wonder why up to now.

I forced myself to pursue an engineering course, all my future plans were made by my parents: my dad wants me to pursue geology, then my mom depends on my dad, and then I just function for fashion. I failed the entrance test for my Geology Course which results to a disappointment for the part of my father, and then I went for art school but my mom scared the living hell out of me, then I just went for Mechanical Engineering in honor of my dad. I always cried myself to sleep because I've failed to keep my dreams and at the same time for what engineering school has in store for me.

In Engineering schools, there's not much of a way to express yourself in a fashionable way because no one will appreciate how you dress yourself—they’re all guys for cupcake's sake! No one will ever look you in the face and say, “how much does that bag cost” or "giirrrrll! I'm lovin' ya hurrr". I'm an outcast, or should I say "The Fashionable Outcast". Ever since I walked in that class, I already knew I didn't belong. I repeat they're all guys; all my life I've been surrounded by girls because all of my siblings are girls. I have a hard time starting or keeping a conversation with guys because I just don't know how they function—even though technically, I'm a guy myself—I can't even keep a conversation with my dad.

So far engineering school seems to like me and I am starting to like math—which I despise a lot since grade school. My own instincts really know what's good for me but my parents will always know what's best for me. I never hated them for sending me to engineering school I just didn't like engineering courses at that time. My dreams will never be forgotten, I'm going to be a future engineer/fashion designer. I will merge the two opposing courses in an unimaginable way that the world can't even fathom how it works, I'll soon bring cutting-edge technology in the fashion industry. I will garner the likes of all people and I will be the most innovative designer of all time *cough *cough

Dream big, believe in yourself because as what Marilyn Monroe said, “If you’re not going to believe in yourself, then who else will?” People will always say you can’t do it because they’re afraid of what you can do. It may seem impossible now but trust me; anything is possible if you have God. Chase dreams not people.